GAHHHH, this is like the best thing ever! haha

No, seriously... I'm dying to do this now. OH.MY.Gosh. This looks like so much fun.

http://thecolorrun.com/

Go to that website to learn more about it. There's one in Cleveland, OH for June 16th. Woo! My sister found it and showed it to me and we're crossing our fingers and hoping to go! We hope to make it a sister excursion that would include going to either the Toledo or Cleveland Zoo and Cedar Point, then doing the race. That would be so awesome, I can't even tell you.

Basically, you run/walk a 5k and at every kilometer point you get color thrown on you. So, by the end of the race, you're all colorful. We thought it would be cool to do that then go to the zoo all covered in color. You wear white and, gah it looks so much fun!

You have to watch this video. Tell me this DOESN'T look fun!

 

This is the one from VEGAS. having lived in Vegas, THAT ONE WOULD HAVE BEEN SWEET! Holy cow!

There's some checking into costs (I think the run is only $40, though. Not bad) of what our whole trip would be and we'd have to check with our hubsters and I'd either take Bri with me or not, but I hope it works out. I really do. This would just be the best thing ever...

Seriously, I hope you watched the video. It looks like fun, right?

You know, if any of you all are near there or will be near there, you should go and we can all run together, haha. How fun would THAT be?

I couldn't wait to get home to share this. I'm so excited! *girly squeals*

Lack of self esteem is not something I'm immune too. I definitely have my moments. However, there's something that's been on my mind for a while.

I remember opening my yahoo page, a while back, and seeing that article about girls on YouTube who were asking "Am I Pretty or Ugly". Of course, I was curious. So I went and watched a few of the vids. I really felt bad for these girls. They are so young and asking the people on YouTube, of all places, that kind of question, is just never a good idea. People are just cruel.

I also remembered that post on Datingish, where the girl felt she was "just the cute girl". Well, the guy she was with did sound like an @$$, but... I don't think there's anything wrong with being "cute". I'm flattered if people think I'm cute.

Besides, this is my way of thinking. Whether you're being called beautiful, pretty or cute, you're attractive. You're not being called ugly, you're being called attractive. Who cares what the word is! But, that's just me.

Maybe you want "that girls hair" or you want "her eyes". Maybe you feel ugly. Hey, I've been there. I had awkward teenage years of acne and, well, just awkwardness, haha. I had a crush on a guy and a friend told him. His response was, "ewww". No joke. I had two teachers that both told our class something about beauty... And this pretty much sums up what I believe on outward beauty...

My history teacher told us, "You may not think anyone finds you attractive, but your future spouse will. There will always be someone who WILL find you attractive. 

My english teacher told us, "That guy/girl you don't think is attractive right now, could grow up and be the most beautiful person you'll ever see. Don't rule them out".

I believe that beauty is in the EYE OF THE BEHOLDER. Some people will find you attractive, beautiful, cute, pretty, whatever word you like. And some won't. AND THAT'S OKAY. Don't let the ones who DON'T find you attractive get you down.  And because this is the truth, you owe it to yourself to NOT get down on yourself. You live with yourself, you need to be happy with yourself. Don't let others dictate how you treat or see yourself. That's no good. And it's truly a waste of time.

Then there is that whole inward beauty thing. You know, I don't think it matters HOW beautiful one is on the outside, if they have an "ugly" inside, no one will care how pretty they are. Likewise, you may not feel like some beauty queen that all the guys are fawning over, but if you have a beautiful heart on the inside, it'll reflect. You're a beautiful person inside AND out. Believe me!

You're gorgeous and beautiful and need to feel that way. Here's your reminder. Yes, YOU are BEAUTIFUL.

Those are my thoughts, for the evening...

So, it's Monday... and I have nothing to blog about. Now, normally, I can put out about 5 posts a day, if I truly wanted to. But I don't do that, as to not annoy anyone. Some of the topics I've considered blogging about are as follows.

Domestic violence

"Don't want to pay for dinner?" - Free dates that cost no money

My xanga journey

Brianna's birth story (Since Momaroo is doing birth week and I figure I can help Mandi out by submitting some thing, even if I don't like submitting things to ish sites, anymore. Meh, it's just a birth story ).

50 questions that will free your mind (part 3 & 4)

And, I even considered doing a post/competition for a xanga, err, huband thing. It was all going to be in good fun, lol. I think someone else is doing that, but I'm not their friend, so I don't know. Not to copy or anything, but I thought it would be fun and silly and I like to do fun and silly things on here.

However, I don't feel like talking about any of it right now. In fact, 2 of those post are already typed out and put on private, lol. I just don't feel like making them public. In fact, I don't know how many private posts I actually have, lol. Because, that's what I do when I have a lot to say. I'll type it out, make it private and "come back to it later" but, because I blog so much as it is, I end up forgetting about it. Oh well... LOL.

So, instead, I came up with this idea. it's fun to think about.

This morning, I got on the scale. I was actually happy too, because I had a good week, last week. Despite being sick for that day. But, I'm now less than a pound (4 oz, to be exact) from my SECOND GOAL. Hence why I felt like doing girly squeals. I thought that deserved a trip to the basement to hunt up that old bag of clothes I had from when I was this weight before. I did find it and I did grab a bunch of stuff out of it. Sadly, some of it still doesn't fit, but most of it just shrunk. I seriously couldn't have gotten any taller???? lol. I hate it when you raise your arms and your shirt comes up and everyone can see your stomach or you bend over and everyone sees your back. not cool. So, I'll donate those ones. I thought maybe that would be my solution to getting new clothes, because my current clothes are too big (yay!). However, that wasn't the solution... as only about 4 of the shirts fit correctly and that's my last bag of clothes I had from before. Sooooo... a trip to salvation army is in store, considering we don't have tons of money to spend on clothes. And how can you complain with a $2 shirt? I'm certainly not. I love cheap clothes! I'm cheap! .

Buttt... I do like looking up clothes I would like to get anyway, even if it is too expensive and I probably won't end up getting it. Hey, I'm still working at earning some money from home and what not, so we'll see... So, here are some things I like. I ramble a lot, geez... Even typing I ramble...

I saw this one and laughed.

.... meh....

I STILL like this one...

And I still think that's super cute.

I know I've posted some of these before. I need to go to a new website, lol...

I like things with a v-neck. Just sayin...

Meh, I'll have to look up some other places later. Nothing is coming to mind.

In my next vlog, I'll have to wear one of the two Michigan shirts I found, hehe. You know, to show pride for my state and all. And then I'll do the correct hat vlog (sorry, bahaha), too.

Oh geez.

I should get busy doing something other than this.

Have a good day, people!

The good news is, I'm out of my emotional funk and into my silly self. I could blog about THAT too, but we'll see...

 

In midair and floating off to space,
I’m moving in,
Your hair is falling all around my face,
Like a parachute,
I’m breathing in,
You’re breathing out the same,
We give and take,
And let the water fall on the flame,
It’s not burning out

I’ll keep you warm,
Dancing in a downpour,
And I will hold your body slowly turning,
I’ll keep you warm,
Dancing in a downpour,
Breathe it in,
We’ll take it off and soak our skin

She’s in a town that holds a lonely road,
And the night is falling,
There’s a road that follows to a home,
And the sky is heavy,
In the home she’s in a lonely room,
With music playing,
Can she hear my heart coming through,
On the door between

I’ll keep you warm,
Dancing in a downpour,
And I will hold your body slowly turning,
I’ll keep you warm,
Dancing in a downpour,
Breathe it in,
We’ll take it off and soak

Maybe I’ll find you,
Maybe I won’t,
Baby I’ll try to,
Even if I don’t,
You are what I never knew I needed,
What I never knew I needed,
What I never knew I needed,
Almost there

I’ll keep you warm,
Dancing in a downpour,
And I will hold your body slowly turning,
I’ll keep you warm,
Dancing in a downpour,
Breathe it in,
We’ll take it off and soak our skin

-Rainy Zurich, The Fray

*Sigh* Hopeless romantic... And it's a really beautiful song!

 

The Fastest Way to Get people to avoid you...

1. Talk about rape.

I've found that pretty much does the trick.

2. Or, you know, politics.

Duh.

3. Be openly emotional

That one works like a charm. Let. Me. Tell. You.

Word to the wise, no one wants to see you cry. They want to see you laughing. You laugh, they come around. You cry, they go away. Just saying. *We're not all like that, though. I'm certainly not, but that's because I know how it feels. *

4. Say you have a crush on them

haha... no, really, that works! But, at the end of the day, it's okay to look like a fool. More people will avoid you, for being a fool, but oh the fun it is to be foolish!

5. Just don't talk

Hey, I'm extremely shy and I'm not the "life of the party". I've found that most people in my real life just assume I'm some boring, quiet girl who doesn't have any fun and, therefore, they leave me alone and i'm not the first person they call when they want to have a good time. It's okay, really... The ones who REALLY get to know me know different and I'm glad that THEY see the real me.

6. Ask stupid questions

I ask stupid questions. Now this one question was not really a real question I had, but it did get me blocked. "What is an ice storm". Stupid grant, he wanted me to act dumb and ask her that. She thought I was super dumb and blocked me, haha. Oooops. So, yeah, ask a dumb question and people will leave you alone.

7. Be sarcastic

I'm a very sarcastic person. I've made a simple sarcastic comment and been called a "cunt". It's great fun. Really, you should try it sometime! Everyone will love ya for it!  

8. And, technically, all you have to do is show a shred of clingy-ness or like you need them.

Makes them run every time!

 

I'm sure I could come up with more... And these ones aren't even that good or funny, poo. I could do better...

So, now, I'll leave you with some random sentences, courtesy of @traintrack who gave me the idea! *Hey, whatever I can do to get a laugh. Oh, that's another thing. If you're ever too serious, that's another good way to get people to avoid you. Humor always wins. There's a reason for that.

The advance aborts throughout each attendant! The fruit constrains an outrage. The elite foam coasts after the sneaky beloved. A vicar degenerates! The essence bans a sarcasm. How can an equivalent consumer dip the nastiest sympathy? A complementary track hopes for the debate in the produced override.

 

 

A recent conversation I had with someone, reminded me of the girl I used to be... and how not so far I am from the "girl I used to be".

I've been searching for SOMETHING and I can honestly say that I'm giving up with it. No one can give me what I'm looking for. No one. Time to just accept that and move forward on my own. And I can't give that to anyone else. Nope. Not going to happen. It's just impossible. I wish I could, but I can't. And I wish I could get it, too, but I can't.

And in moments like this, inspiration can arise...

*********************

 

Turn off the lights

I'm doing fine

Just go on home now

I don't need you to save me

I never really needed you

It never really mattered

I wasn't your first choice anyway

Just go on home now

I don't need you to save me

 

 

***********

In a perfect world, I could just be left alone with my music, my pen and paper and my thoughts. That's really all I need.

I've learned that I have a ton, a ton, of thoughts I want to share. Sometimes I do, most of the time I don't. The point is, most of it doesn't even matter and I'm sick and tired of letting things get to me. So, these are some pictures I took today. Meh

Woo!

 

 

Last night, 3 tornadoes touched down in our "area". Not really too close to where I live, it was all underneath of us. I was thankful all we got was a little thunder and lightning. Also, we're going to be in the 70's all week and almost hitting 80. Yeah, last May, I remember still wearing a spring coat and here we are in march not needing coats, bahaha. Oh, this should be a fun summer....

I also feel sick again.

Not many people know about this or will know what I'm talking about. In fact, i think I only told two people this, so you won't know what I mean. Sorry. But I'm keeping up my end of the "deal" and I feel powerless. Yet, if I say anything about it, I feel like it'll start an argument and just further prove the point that I'd rather be doing "something else". But, his end of the bargain is hard to keep up with, because my needs are much different than his. So, he gets out of his much easier, because I'm not all that "demanding and controlling" and I'm starting to get pissed off.

But I'll get off that topic before I start crying... because I am frustrated right now.

I feel like i need to puke, I don't know what's wrong with me. I feel like I might be running a fever, again, or it's just that it's warm in here. We have windows open and fans on, but still... and I just feel weak and sore and there's this big bump on my shoulder, between my shoulder and my neck. It hurts to bad. Maybe a knot? I'd have someone rub the darn thing, but I don't' like people rubbing my shoulders, cause it always hurts regardless, lol. Yes, I'm serious. Or people are generally too rough and it drives me crazy.

well, I gotta go call my sister. I need a ride to get our hair cuts. Well, it's just trimming of the bangs. I hate that they are in my eyes and, thankfully, I'm able to go get them trimmed. I'll have to not tell my sister that I'm not feeling well, otherwise she'll avoid me. Her and her hubby are germaphobes, even though she's a nurse, lol. Anyway, then hopefully go get her birthday present. She was born on St. Patrick's day. Tomorrow, we get to go over to their house and celebrate her birthday. I'm excited to play games on the wii. It's been a few months.

Hopefully, I don't start puking again, or that will ruin everything.

Plus I have a random St. Patrick's Day thing to work on with Bri. I think we'll do it today. The hubster has the day off of work, but his gout hit again and his foot is killing him. *sigh*. So, I'm playing nurse to him, once again. Last night was interesting. I would randomly wake up, thinking I was going to pass out or something, because I felt so bad. Brianna would wake up crying, because she was hot and miserable (Yeah, we already need to get our AC unit in and it's march. it really is ridiculous). Then he was up and down a lot in pain and, at 2 in the morning, dropped his cane down the stairs and it slammed into the door. I'm sure everyone in the house woke up, then lucky me got to get up and go get it. Then I'm like, "it's 2 am? Seriously? I feel like I've been in bed forever....". LOL, who feels like that? But I did go to bed earlier than usual.

1. I need to stop staying up till 2 am the nights he's not home.

2. Sugar hates me. I need to avoid it

Or, I just have some random bug that isn't going away easily, even though I was fine yesterday. I don't know what gives.

Oh well, I need to go get stuff done. Too much. Too much. I just remembered the phone call I got yesterday for food testing and that's today. Ugh. I don't know if I can do it, though. Food just... doesn't go down easily. I could hardly eat my breakfast. A couple bites was like painful to eat.

anyway, this is just a bunch of random whining. I do fee like crying. I'm just emotional, meh! lol I'm a girl, what can I say.

but if the sister comes over and we get out and do stuff, I'll get happier! wooo!

 

This is the hat Vlog that @buddy71 and @mytwocentss thought I should do. But I only did 1 hat, lol. *Now I'm getting another idea. Ooooh, ooooh, yes! Love that* Now, I really don't care if you watch this or not, but if you can't... because I explained who I dreamed about and the dreams I had (sort of) in the Vlog, I still wanted to let you know who I've dreamed about.  So I'm tagging those who I talked about...

 

And I Managed to make it UNDER 5 minutes. GO ME!

 

The Xangans I've had dreams about

@TrainTrack

@Mytwocentss

@Againstthewind1

@TheTheologianscafe

Well, goodness, why would this surprise anyone? shoot. lol I'm so predictable.

But, there are many others of you who I would love to have grace my dreams . No, really! lol...

Oh, I got this idea from @LkJslain

So, now you all need to share which xangans you've had dreams about. Go!

 

all of these were done, yesterday, when I was feeling better and going off of 3 hours of sleep, lol. I really didn't want to post BOTH the vlog and the hat pictures, because I have to be in the mood and, today, I'm not as perky and upbeat, like I was yesterday. (throwing up 3 times will do that to ya. I just forced down some cheerios. I'm looking forward to it coming back up, too). BUT, I said I'd post the hat pictures in my vlog, therefore I'll do both. I figure, you all can have a laugh at my expense or something. Maybe you need a laugh today. Or you can just think it's stupid. I don't care. So, here...  The vlog is kind of stupid, haha. It was supposed to be about the girly squeaks, squeals, but I don't think I did that very well... have to be excited and in the moment, lol. But, I need to get this done before my energy is gone and I'm back bowing down before the porcelain throne, so... fine...

  

"did I just read that...?"

What I think of most stuff on datingish...

Okay, these weren't nearly as good as my first round with hats. lol. But I finally got hold of the one big manly hat and couldn't resist, lol.

 This is for St. Patricks Day. Wooo  

You stinker.

Okay, gotta go... vomit calls...

have a good day you all. Whoever got me sick is going to PAY FOR IT. Just sayin'. And, if it was one of you, I'll hunt you down and stick gum in your hair. You just watch me!