*Since I have the time and all. Screw the 10 pm bedtime*.

There are many other awesome people on here that I wanted to say something too!

@mytwocentss -- you're my new bestie! I feel like I can share anything with you, we agree on a lot of issues and you've been around to listen to my venting, lol. I really appreciate it and love your attitude and encouragement.

@Againstthewind1 -- know I just met you and all, but I haven't laughed nearly as much in a long time, as I have the last how many other days reading your stuff. You're freaking hilarious and I love it.

@aletheas_unspoken_words -- You've been so supportive and super nice and Kind! You're a great friend.

@cecilliamarie -- I love reading your posts. I love your attitude and your encouragement. Plus, I think you're a really awesome mom!

@xxallisonwonderlandxx -- Love the new name, though I already told you that, lol. I'm just really glad I met you on here. you're a cool girl!

@osuwarinuyasha -- We have motherhood in common and you're just a very neat girl!

@Awakeinthenight -- I feel really close to you, even though we don't talk much on here. You're such a great girl!

@mommymarty22 -- Even though I just met you, you're hilarious and really nice.

@xcntrychicka --  I look forward to getting to know you better. I'm glad you had interest in my weight loss challenge, lol, and we have that in common. I want to read more of your posts. You're a really nice girl.

@zoedark --I'm thankful for your helpful, encouraging and nice comments!

*And there's so many people on here I want to get to know bettter.*

Xanga is full of Awesome, awesome people!

Thanks, @AgainstTheWind1, for this aweome idea! Just sayin'.

I'd love to dedicate a post to many of my friends on here, however there's one person on here who has known me the longest. He's known me since I was 16 or 17 (probably 17, but my memory is failing me. Maybe he remembers better, lol).

Whenever I think of Train Tracks, trees, tree houses or sagebrush, I think of him and it puts a smile on my face.

I'm talking about you, @TrainTrack.

He's been a very supportive and loyal friend to me.

Like I said, he's known me for a LONG time (If I was really 17, it would be 8 years. Hard to believe). He's, basically, seen how I've grown over the years. He was with me when I was an incredibly dramatic teenager, lol, to the less dramatic (I hope, lol) me now.  And he's always been there for me. He always managed to cheer me up and put a smile on my face when I needed it. We've had such good conversations over the years and I have fond memories of them.

Though I've never met him in person, we did live in the same state, once upon a time. Now I can share in the beauty of Nevada (not necessarily Las Vegas, but the rest of it). I actually would love to meet him in person, so I can give him a great, big, gigantic hug.  Seriously.

I feel very blessed to know him and I'm very thankful for his friendship. He's truly a great guy who loves others, respects others and stands up for what he believes in (and I'll always stand beside him in those things, too). He's really funny and just overall awesome. I love him!

 

 

 

Is a new chance to try and get it right.

Love waking up knowing I have another chance to do just that...

Love this.

*Had to spit out one more post before bed.  I think I'm setting a new post and pulse record today . But, starting tomorrow, I need to get back to my 10pm bedtime and stop with my xanga obsession*

Now, on to my point.

Ah, Chivalry. Currently a hot topic on Datingish .

Here's my opinion.

I see nothing wrong with chivalrous people. If a man WANTS to open doors for a lady, WANTS to give her his coat, WANTS to pull our her chair and WANTS to pay for her meal, that's great. But, it shouldn't be expected. Therein lies the problem. Nobody really wants to do nice things for someone who just expects it, right?

The idea is that women just want men to do everything and aren't willing to do it in return. Since we have, you know, vagina's, we're princessess and therefore can't open a car door by ourself or pay for our own meal and the poor men of the world are just expected to do it.

I beg to differ.

Who, really, is forced into being chivalrous? It's a choice, am I right? You don't' HAVE to do anything, if you don't want to. And that's the great thing about Dating, and why we date in general, to, you know, weed people out. If you meet a girl who, say, needs you to open her door or she'll get mad and you don't like that, break up with her. Simple as that. Not rocket science. If you realy like her and are willing to do it, then deal with it. Simple as that. We all have choices. We don't have to date people.... It's our choice to do so. Just like its your choice to do chivalrous things.

Quite frankly, I'd pay for my husbands dinner. Dur. I'd open his car door if he needed me too, dur. And he Does the same for me. In fact, I've really never dated any guy who's opened doors for me. My husband I think only did that a few times and I know he used to get upset if I opened a door by myself (if we were at, say, burger king). Do you think that's still the way it is after 5 years of marriage? Ha, no! I can open my own door. And I do. And I don't complain about men who don't open the door for me (I have thought it when on a bus, though, lol. Just kidding. Well...).

I'd rather you hold the door open for me because you want too, not because I have a vagina?

you get me?

But, of course, reading all the comments on the Datingish post really irked me, for some reason. I guess I don't like the generalization that all women expect men to do those things or that, if you say you appreciate those things, that you're still expecting it. Appreciating it and expecting are two totally different things. People need to get that straight. I don't consider myself special for having a vagina and that sure isn't the only way I thank a man for doing nice things for me (as one guy suggested. Yes, we just thank men with our vaginas. that's all we have to offer Really?)

So, then I just got mad and told about how much more I appreciated my mother, who worked a job, worked in the home (yardwork, cleaning, etc.), did all the grocery shopping, put up with his sorry ass and paid all the bills. yet, she wasn't on the Internet whining about having to "do it all". She just did it and she didn't whine about it (but then I went on to say that the men were whiny bitches. I was only talking about a few of them on there, not all men in general. i love most men. Men are great and awesome! And a lot of men make a lot of sacrifices for their family). So, I'm not saying that women have it harder, but I'm also not saying men have it harder. I think we all have it harder in our own unique ways? Yeah, something like that. lol

Anyway, I just had to get this out.

Again, there are valid concerns regarding chivalry (even though I still love chivalrous people!). No one should ever expect people to do nice things, but be thankful when they are done. You can do them out of the goodness of your heart. Open the door for someone because you WANT too, not because they have certain genitals.

Hope this makes sense. I'm kinda tired.

 

*mini vent, I promise that I will be positive tomorrow, lol*

Today was a, basically, good day. Stuff happens. Whatever. I enjoyed the time I got to myself. Even though my husband wanted to clean and rearrange everything. Anyway, I got things accomplished and am still spending way too much time on here. But, some things just really bugged me and now I'm just at a point where... I don't know.

My mom and gramma took Bri to church with them, this morning. Originally, we were supposed to go up to Clarkston for my "birthday lunch". Well, that didn't happen, obviously, but I'm totally okay with it. Another time. But they still took her to church, regardless and once they got home...

My gramma came in the back door and she takes a while to get up the two stairs (she's 89 after all). Well, she made the remark, "well you could have helped" (I'm assuming, now, she meant helping her with the stuff in her hand. Even though, one of the items was on the floor and I didn't see it till later, anyway. Yeah). She laughed, but... I just wasn't having it. THen my  mom asked if we had been cleaning. Now, I can take this one of two ways. SHe was just curious or she couldn't tell a difference, lol. I still don't know which. I did clean the bathroom. Good Lord. and we cleaned our little area upstairs. Bleh. But, otherwise, the house really isn't all that messy...

THen my gramma came back in the room and said, "well, you have a lot stuff in your room", talking to my mom. Sure enough, there were 3 filled boxes of junk on her floor, that my husband had cleaned out of the filing cabinet. *facepalm*. So, my gramma acted all exagerated and then she goes, "why did he think she WANTED to go through this?".  Um, I don't think he did. He was cleaning, took it out and, instead of just throwing it away, put it in her room. So, add that to the list of things my husband can't do right.

Look, I know me and my husband are going through a rough time and all right now, but I can't STAND how little those two get along. Part of it is his fault, but she definitely plays a part too and when that blatant unappreciation is show, it pisses me off. Beyond belief.

We've also been using my gramma's car, since our silly truck (it's an SUV, really) broke down. He is now working on sundays, instead of late on fridays. Usually, my mom and gramma go to church together, in the evening, but I guess that's not happening tonight. After he just called me, to ask if I wanted him to bring home dinner, she called me on her cell, from downstairs, asking if he was on his way home. I said no, not quite yet and she was all exasperated and crap. Because she need her car.

Cue my feelings of wanting to just move out. We need our independence again, I freaking swear. i don't feel welcome here anymore. I have a much better relationship with people WHEN I'M NOT LIVING WITH THEM.

so, yeah, just add it to the list of the things we can't get right.

I'm telling you, New Mexico is sounding sweeter and sweeter (and I don't like new mexico!). Or maybe Arizona? Or.... he mentioned Nevada again. Nevada... again? How bout utah? Geez, anywhere at this point.

*and I don't feel like going back and fixing spelling errors. Forgive me!)

I've had many, many interesting, crazy dreams lately. My husband has a book on interpreting dreams, but I'm too lazy to find it and who needs that when you have the internet.

So, here we go.

1. The other night, I had a dream that we had a tornado touch down, near our house. We had another family over and we all were congregating in our garage. Which is nuts. Our garage is a mess. Anyway, we all hunkered down in the garage, watching the tornado get closer to us and finally someone closed the garage door. I looked at my sister and said, "um, why are we in the garage and not in the basement of the house?". Dur. The tornado didn't actually hit us, but stopped right before hitting us. I was then balling in the arms of a xanga friend, who shall remain nameless. lol Anyway, what could this mean?

Interpretation:

"it may represent violent emotional storms in your dreams"

"consider the emotional changes in your life and also the amount of anger and
rage that you may be currently experiencing."

lol. Okay.

Moving on

2. I keep having this dream that I'm with the guy I had a crush on in high school. This guy and i have never had ONE conversation, EVER, but he was just the one I always liked. Anyway, I had this one dream that I was raped, he saved me, we made out on a park bench and got married. Then I had another one where we were making out and eventually got married. hmm..

Interpretation:

I don't know what to look under for this one. adultery? I'm not technically committing adultery in my dream. as I'm marrying the dude. So... and it's not like he's an old boyfriend. Maybe it's just that I saw his wedding pictures on facebook and thought of him? And I'm not going to lie, the dreams were nice, lol (well, besides the rape part, lol). But, since the common theme is that we're kissing, I'll look under kiss

"Kissing is usually an indication of warmth, affection, and happiness. If you
don't receive enough love and affection in your daily life, then this could be a
compensatory dream, where the dreamer is comforting himself."

 how did they know!

3. I had a dream that my husband drugged me and set me up to be raped by some of his friends. Yeah, that was awkward.

Interpretation:

"Since rape is a brutal and deeply personal violation, it suggests that the
dreamer may be feeling robbed of options and negated as a human being."

"If you were a rape victim, the traumatic nature of this experience may cause you
to have a dream like this from time to time."

Yeah, I'm used to rape dreams. I have them all the time.

4. I had a dream that my mom was trying to kill me. Seriously. She burned the house down and made several attempts on my life. Also, awkward.

Interpretation:

"Take the hint and pay closer attention to your finances, business matters,
health, and things in general. If you faced the danger in your dream, it may be
a positive sign and an indication that you are capable of overcoming current
obstacles."

Interesting.

5. I had a dream that my sister died and I was literally so broken and thought there was no point in life. Yeah, that dream SUCKED.

Interpretation:

I think I had this dream, because it was right after she took a fall and had a concussion (that she didn't know about) and went home and slept for 12 hours. I'm glad that she woke up and is now healthy!

"Dreaming about someone that you care about may express your fear about losing
them."

Yep. I agree.

So, really, these were all spot on interpretations, which is kind of scary, lol.

But, this was fun.

I really hate this subject and, honestly, I don't really care for politics. I just believe that most politicians are corrupt and that's just how it is.

I'm an independent. I don't really go to either side. However, I'd vote for either side, if I felt that the candidate was one that I liked and agreed with.

Four years ago, I liked Mitt Romney and it was, obviously, John McCain. I didn't like him. I also didn't like Obama. Go figure. So I voted independent.

If it came between Romney and Obama, I would vote Romney. I'm just that certain.

What I DON'T appreciate is this.

I said that on Theo's site, when he asked everyone if they would vote Obama and Romney. So, this person replies to a bunch of different people and then, after he got done with his rant, said "Ron Paul 2012".

Okay, I'm not going to force my personal political opinions down everyone's throat. I'll vote whoever the hell I want too and you can do the same, so shut up. I don't want to hear it.

This is why I don't talk about this crap.

This is important and I know that's why everyone gets emotional. And there's a reason we all vote in privacy, it's none of everyone elses freaking business. You do your thing and I'll do mine. I'll freely talk about what I'll do. I won't vote Obama. I didn't 4 years ago. If other people want to vote for him, they can knock themselves out.

I don't know. I'm just irritated right now and wanted to say this.

You do your thing, I'll do mine. Thanks.

We got a letter, the other day, that my dads parole (Supervision Discharge Date) is being extended. I guess what that means is that he's still on a tether monitor, there's still a restraining order and what not. Good news. It goes until July 27th of this year.

We all were wondering WHY it was extended?

I wonder if he did something?

My mom was going to call some lady to see if she could find out if he had done something. I don't know. It makes my sister a little more nervous. Yeah... I guess. We'll see.

But, for now, I'm just happy that the restraining order is still in place and he still has to wear that wonderful tracker on his ankle.

(I know I've had conflicting feelings over this. I'm just trying not to think about it!)

 

*This is my bucket list of Cities I want to visit*

1. Seattle

2. San Francisco

3. Denver

I've been very close to Denver... but we really didn't get quite that far. Sucked.

4. Salt Lake City

Just sounds so pretty

Love those mountains. Oh, to live close to those again...

5. Houston, Dallas, other cities in Texas. I just want to go to Texas, period. lol  We drove through Texas once. That was it.

6. Nashville

Nashville looked so pretty from the air, lol! So stinking pretty!

7. Orlando

Disney world, hello!

8. Washington D.C.

9. New York City

Duh!

10. Boston

*******

Cities I've already been too!

Santa Monica, Ca.

San Diego, Ca.

Las Vegas (loved living there... kind of, lol)

Santa Fe, NM

St. Louis

Chicago